Q. I really don't know what to do anymore. It's like I am not trying at all, although I do everything I possibly can. I have a 10-year-old girl and I have been struggling before she was born. Now that I have her it is even worse. I am not well educated, but I can read and write. I will do anything that is good to keep my child from growing up the same way I did. I came to the United States to work for one year, but I did not work for one day. If I had, then we could have started a better life.

I do not know if I am approaching life in the wrong way as a single parent. Sometimes, I feel I am grouping with the wrong people, but I do not know how to group with the right people. Even though there are people in worse position, I don't think there are people who understand what we really feel and what we are going through.

Let me tell you this, I have learnt that family and living good with people are very important even though it is a hard world to live in. My daughter is the only family I know now and I am the only family she has. Sometimes, I feel like giving up, but I cannot. My daughter is the one who keeps me from giving up. When I think about killing myself, the thoughts come to my mind about who is going to keep her from failing? Who is going to love her? Who will she talk to when she has problems, when she is crying?

I am honest, a good person, all I need to get there is a start. I do not have the foundation that is the key to life. I believe a foundation can start from anything, any where, and family ... I do not have any of those.

I am 33 years and I do not know where my life will end. If my life ends, then my daughter's life ends too.

A. Friend, remember that from you have life there is hope. What are some of your goals? Get a notebook and write down some plans that you have for you and your daughter. Then think of how you can get to reach those goals. You may not reach them quickly overseas. It may mean that you have to come back home and start small. What is important is that you think of where you want to get to and take steps to get there. Remember to pray always. Are you going to a church while you are overseas? I am sure that the pastor of the church will listen to you and give you positive advice. There may even be free community counselling in the area you are staying. Check the telephone directory and see whether any church or community agency gives free counselling near you.

Each night before you go to sleep write down three good things that happened to you. They may be as simple as I laughed today; I had a good lunch; or, a friend called to say hello. When you do this you will keep thinking positive.

Q. I have a three-year-old son who doesn't seem to respond when he is spoken to or punished. He just keeps on doing the same naughty things over and over. He is currently attending pre-school. He is intelligent and I think he is advanced academically for his age. However, his teacher says he is very busy and at times disruptive. Is it that he is a gifted child and is not challenged enough or does he have behavioural problems? I need your advice.

A. To determine whether your child is gifted, you should have him tested by a psychologist. Whatever the results of the test, ensure that you and your family work with his school to help him to be the best he can be. Being the best means doing well in schoolwork and also in behaviour.

Q. I am having problems buying educational games for my pre-teen children. How do I choose the best ones?

A. There are quite a few good ones on the market - table and computer games. However, you must remember that most are made in the United States of America and so will have American spelling and American history and may not have the metric system in some of the math activities. There are British educational games available too. If you go a bookstore, ask the staff to help you choose, or go on the Internet and search for what is most appropriate for your children. You can then ask someone to order from the Internet for you.

Orlean Brown Earle, PhD, is a child psychologist and family therapist. Dr Brown Earle works with children with learning and behaviour problems throughout the island and in the Caribbean. Email questions to helpline@gleanerjm.com or send to Ask the Doc, c/o The Gleaner Company, 7 North Street, Kingston.