She is always telling me and her other close friends about what she and her boyfriend do in bed. According to her he is a wonderful lover.
I cannot say that I would want him as a boyfriend, but he is very good looking and probably has a good body. According to her, he really knows how to turn a woman on, with his oral sex skills and 'finger play'. He also seems to have a number of sex toys. They are talking about getting married next year.
Doctor, I am prepared to believe all this, but I am not sure if she is lying when she tells us about her orgasms. She claims that there are nights when her boyfriend makes her have maybe 12 or 16 orgasms in one night.
My personal experience of sex has been very different. To be honest I have only had about four boyfriends since I was 18.
When I was a teenager, I never had an orgasm. I didn't experience one until I was around 23 years old.
And it was only last year that I found out that a second orgasm in one evening really was possible for me.
I do have a boyfriend at the moment, but he does not treat me very well and I don't want to marry him. Sex with him is OK, but his main objective is to get inside as fast as possible, and then have his orgasm.
I keep having to remind him that I have needs too! And it is with some difficulty that I persuade him to let me have an orgasm.
I am embarrassed to admit to you doctor, but there are nights when after he has fallen asleep, I still feel frustrated and have to give myself a second orgasm.
Is this bad? Will it hurt me? Should I tell him about it?
So you can see why I am reluctant to believe that my friend is really 'doing it' 12 or 16 times in a night. Do you think she is telling the truth?
A Well, I can see that you have put a lot of thought into this question. Let me begin by pointing out a number of important differences between you and your friend.
She seems to have a very nice boyfriend. From what you say, you do NOT.
Her boyfriend is planning to marry her. You and your partner have no such plans.
Her boyfriend is apparently good in bed, particularly at foreplay and your boyfriend clearly is not.
Her boyfriend is skilled at oral sex. You do not mention that yours tries it at all.
She is older than you are and I can tell you that being a little more experienced makes a woman more likely to have multi-orgasms.
Therefore, it is not unlikely that she is having a better time in bed than you are.
Is it medically impossible to have so many orgasms in one night? It is not impossible.
There are no definite world record for female orgasms. A lot of women are perfectly happy with ONE for the night. Others prefer to have multiple.
But I can assure you that a few women can easily 'do' 15 or even 20 climaxes in one night, if they really wanted to. Often, they report that they have them at a rate of perhaps one every half-minute or so.
I have heard stories of some women 'achieving' more than that, but I have no way of ensuring that these accounts are really true.
But certainly, your friend's accounts of her orgasms are far from unlikely. WHY she is telling the rest of you about what they do in bed is another matter. Maybe she wants to make you all feel jealous?
Anyway, you do not seem to be happy with your present situation. Frankly, I feel that you should get out of this present relationship. In the long term, it would be better if you found a man whom you love and who loves you. If you formed a happy relationship with such a man, I don't think you would have to worry about whether you were having enough orgasms.
You do not need to worry about the fact that you sometimes make yourself have a second orgasm. That is perfectly OK, and will not hurt you.
However, I see no need to tell your current boyfriend about it. I wish you well.
Q Doctor, I have not had sex since my wife died three years ago. A woman has indicated to me that she is willing to sleep with me.
Do you think I should get some Viagra just in case?
A I do not see any need for that, especially as you have not indicated that you have 'lost your nature'.
If you just take things easy and don't rush, you should be OK.
Q I am a 34 year old woman and I have been feeling tired all year. I have been checked for anaemia, and was negative.
A Then I think your next step should be to test for 'sugar', since diabetes often make you feel that way. Please take a urine specimen to a doctor, who can give you a check-up.